This is a Relief Society lesson I taught back in March 2009.
Elder Bednar
says, “Prayer becomes more meaningful as we counsel with the Lord in all our
doings, as we express heartfelt gratitude, and as we pray for others.”
He then goes on to discuss those three
principles in his talk. So what I’d like to think about and discuss today is
how we do those things and why they make our prayers more meaningful.
I.
Counseling with the Lord
1.
How do we counsel with the Lord?
First of all, what does it mean to
counsel?
I looked up a couple definitions, and I
think some of what I found gives good insights into what we’re supposed to be
doing.
(noun) 1.
Interchange of opinions as to future procedure; consultation; deliberation
(verb) 2. To
get our take counsel or advice
A couple things that stood out to me
here are that there is an interchange of opinions—this is two-way communication.
We need to make sure that when we counsel with the Lord, we actually talk to
Him and we let Him talk as well. And then we need to take the advice He gives
us.
2.
What should we counsel with the Lord about?
Elder Bednar quotes Alma 37:36-37:
“36
Yea, and cry unto God for all thy support; yea, let all thy doings be unto the
Lord, and whithersoever thou goest let it be in the Lord; yea, let all thy
thoughts be directed unto the Lord; yea, let the affections of thy heart be
placed upon the Lord forever.
“37 Counsel
with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when
thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in
your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks
unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day.”
He emphasizes counseling with the Lord
in ALL our doings. I think I have a tendency to only pray about something if
I’m having a problem with it. If work is going well, I don’t pray about it. If
school is going well, I don’t pray about it. But the instruction isn’t just to
counsel with the Lord about the things that are going wrong; it’s to counsel
with Him in ALL things. Certainly we should counsel with Him about our
problems, but we should also talk to Him about the things that are going well.
Another thought that I had is that we
can involve the Lord in the whole process. We’ve probably all heard that we
need to study things out in our minds and make a decision and then take it to
see if the decision is right—and that is true. We need to make the decisions. However,
we need to realize at the same time that we’re not alone in the decision-making
process. I was in a class once, and the teacher asked at what point of the
decision-making process we prayed, and may answer was that I pray the whole way
through. We can pray for guidance, we can pray for discernment, we can pray to
know how to make the decision, etc. For me, I don’t always study things out the
same way; sometimes I make a pros and cons list, sometimes I fast and pray,
sometimes I need to talk to a particular person and gets some insight. So
sometimes, my prayers start out with just asking for help in making the
decision, in knowing which approach to take. The Lord doesn’t only help us at
the end, either by confirming our decision or letting us know that it’s wrong.
He will help us the whole way through, and I think that’s an important part of
counseling—to involve the Lord in the whole process.
3.
How does counseling with the Lord make our
prayers more meaningful?
“As soon as
we learn the true relationship in which we stand toward God (namely, God is our
Father, and we are His children), then at once prayer becomes natural and instinctive
on our part.”
For me, counseling with the Lord teaches
me about that relationship. As I counsel with Him, I receive promptings, I get
guidance, and I receive divine help; this makes me aware that God is working in
my life, that my Father does hear my prayers, and that He will help me. It
shows me that I really am His daughter and He loves me, and then that in turn
changes how I pray. When you know that you’re praying to your Father, prayer is
more meaningful.
II.
Gratitude
Elder Bednar’s second principle for making prayer more
meaningful is to pray for others.
1.
How do we express gratitude?
Elder Bednar
gives one suggestion:
“Let me
recommend that periodically you and I offer a prayer in which we only give
thanks and express gratitude. Ask for nothing; simply let our souls rejoice and
strive to communicate appreciation with all the energy of our hearts.”
So one thing Elder Bednar says we can do
is to have a prayer in which we only express gratitude.
He also gives us some insights into how
to express gratitude in general; he says to let our souls rejoice and strive to
communicate appreciation with all the energy of our hearts. Even if we’re going
to ask God for something in our prayers, we can still express our gratitude
with our whole hearts. I was taught that when you pray, you express gratitude
first, and you ask for things after, so sometimes there’s a temptation to rush
through the gratitude portion and get to what we think we need. But that’s
probably not true gratitude; we need to put our hearts into it and express real
gratitude.
2.
Why does expressing gratitude make our prayers
more meaningful?
Sister
Parkin, former Relief Society General President, gave an awesome talk a few
years ago, called “Gratitude: A Path to Happiness”, and she had some great insights in there. One thing
she mentioned was:
“Gratitude
requires awareness and effort, not only to feel it but to express it.
Frequently we are oblivious to the Lord’s hand. We murmur, complain, resist,
criticize; so often we are not grateful. In the Book
of Mormon, we learn that those who murmur
do not know “the dealings of that God who … created them.” 3 The Lord counsels us not to murmur because it is then
difficult for the Spirit to work with us.
“Gratitude
is a Spirit-filled principle. It opens
our minds to a universe permeated with the richness of a living God.
Through it, we become spiritually aware of the wonder of the smallest things,
which gladden our hearts with their messages of God’s love. This grateful
awareness heightens our sensitivity to divine direction. When we communicate
gratitude, we can be filled with the Spirit and connected to those around us
and the Lord.” (emphasis added)
To me, again, this helps me see that
Father-daughter relationship with god. It lets me know that He is aware of me
and that He loves me, and that always makes my prayers more meaningful. When we
are grateful, the Spirit has the opportunity to show us God’s love.
Sister
Parkin also talked about the story of the 10 lepers:
“Luke
chapter 17 records the experience of the Savior when He healed 10 lepers. As
you recall, only one of the cleansed lepers returned to express his
appreciation. Isn’t it interesting that the Lord did not say, “Your gratitude
has made you whole”? Instead, He said, “Thy faith hath made thee whole.”
7
“The leper’s
expression of gratitude was recognized by the Savior as an expression of his
faith. As we pray and express gratitude to a loving but unseen Heavenly Father,
we are also expressing our faith in Him. Gratitude is our sweet acknowledgment
of the Lord’s hand in our lives; it is an expression of our faith.”
When we express gratitude, we express
faith—and how meaningful can a prayer be if there isn’t any faith in it?
III.
Pray for Others
1.
How?
Elder Bednar says we need to “pray for
others with real intent and a sincere heart.”
I think that means we say more than just a casual “Please bless…” It
means we really think about others’ needs. It also means we’re willing to help
them.
Alma 34:27-28 says,
“27 Yea, and when you
do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him
continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around
you.
“28 And now behold, my
beloved brethren, I say unto you, do not suppose that this is all; for after ye
have done all these things, if ye turn away the needy, and the naked, and visit
not the sick and afflicted, and impart of your substance, if ye have, to those who
stand in need—I say unto you, if ye do not any of these things, behold, your
prayer is vain, and availeth you nothing, and ye are as hypocrites who do deny
the faith.”
This tells us that we need to
pray for others, and then, if we don’t help them, our prayer is in vain.
2.
Why does
praying for others make prayer more meaningful?
I think there are several different
ways that this can make prayer more meaningful.
In praying for our enemies, I
think we need the Lord’s help to do it, and anytime He helps us, then we feel
His love and prayer becomes more meaningful when you know you’re praying to
someone who loves you.
Also, in praying for others, I think
we’re blessed with a sense of His love for others, but that also testifies to
use of how much He loves us.
I remember one time, the girl I
visit taught was going through a really rough time, and I was sitting in my
room one night, and I was going to write her a note just to try to be
supportive, and I prayed for you, probably one of the most sincere prayers I’ve
ever prayed, and I felt so strongly how much God loved her. There was just this
feeling of charity—of pure love—that just filled my entire body. And even though
He was letting me see how much He loved her, I also knew that was how much He loves
me, too.
God is our Father and He does
hear our prayers. He wants us to know about the relationship described in the
Bible Dictionary so that prayer will become natural and instinctive on our
part. As we counsel with Him, as we express gratitude, and as we pray for
others, the Spirit will truly testify to us of that relationship and of how
much our Father loves us, and our prayers will be more meaningful. In the name
of Jesus Christ. Amen.
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